HOW Skills#
Distress ToleranceWeek 1▶️ HOW Skills | DBT Skills from Experts
As with the WHAT skills prior, these skills also help us to remain grounded despite being in distress. They’re to be used simultaneously.
Don’t judge#
Including judgement of myself!
- Notice emotion & feelings, but don’t evaluate as “good” or “bad”.
- Stick to observable facts - check the facts!
- Use positive language & focus on preference, not negativity.
- Acknowledge if your thoughts are harmful/helpful, but don’t judge.
Remember
- You’re still allowed to have your own values, & those values are allowed to be different from other peoples’. It doesn’t mean you should judge yourself.
- You’re allowed to disagree with your own core beliefs while still acknowledging them without judgement.
Stay focused#
- Focus your attention on one thing in the moment.
- Slow yourself down & take a moment to breathe.
- Notice when your mind wanders, which is just what minds do, simply notice where your thoughts have drifted to and refocus your attention when it drifts, again and again.
- Be kind to yourself – continue to refocus as much as you need to, without judgement or criticism.
Do what works#
- Be effective - try different techniques & focus on what works best.
- Don’t let emotions control your behaviour - try coping ahead or the DEAR MAN skill.
- Let go of negative feelings & pessimism; replace the “should"s with “could"s.