Self-Compassion#
Interpersonal EffectivenessWeek 6▶️ Self-Compassion | The School of Life
How to transform shame into self-compassion#
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Understand what shame is#
- Shame is normal
- Shame is the brain’s way of dealing with disconnection or perceived ostracism
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Label shame#
- It’s an emotion, not a fact
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Replace judgement with curiosity#
- Hold your experience of shame with curiosity instead of judgement
- Try to shift into a more understanding perspective about your thoughts
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Acknowledge your inner critic#
- Your inner critic likes to amplify your shame
- Remind yourself that you’re a work in progress & trying the best you can
- Think as if you’re helping someone else
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Practice what is helpful, not harmful#
- Speak to yourself like a friend
- Ask yourself: what actions would help you to recover?
- Avoid perpetuating bad habits.
- Act constructively, not destructively
- Use constructive self-correction instead of self-punishment
Practising self-compassion#
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Self-kindness#
- Treat yourself with kindness rather than harshness
- Extend love & support to yourself in the same way you do to others
- Self-affirmation
- Validate feelings
- Acknowledge that you’re trying your best
- Let yourself take a moment
- Let yourself be happy
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Mindfulness#
- Reflection on previous experiences
- Remember how far you’ve come
- Not ignoring inner pain, but not over identifying with shame
- Don’t take the blame when it’s not yours to take!
- Open, curious & non-judgemental attitude
- Allow yourself to be human; nobody is expected to be flawless
Remember: I am just as worthy as everyone else.